IgorHe is the devil to my angel. Put frankly, he is a cold and calculating bastard for the better part of the day. And when I say bastard, I mean that in both the derogatory and proper uses of the term.Igor Mikhalevitch Dimitriev. He is Russian, and he never lets me forget that he 'grew up' in the days of the Soviet Union. He is exactly what Faith is not. He is crass, acrimonious, and seditious: eager to sow strife behind him everywhere he goes.I know naught of his childhood, though I probably should as he is part of me. What I do know is that his years as a citizen of the USSR have left him as a shell of who he could have been. But what he could have been is nothing like who he is now, and it would be cruel to take him away from what he has become.Dastardly plans flow from his brain as water pours from Niagra Falls. Each one flows right to me, carefully and almost lovingly designed to carry out the revenge that I wish to exact.Though his mind is less than pure by a long sho
FaithShe is, quite literally, my conscience. You know the cartoons where the character has an angel on one side, and a devil on the other? That is me. And Faith is the angel.For a four year old, she is far more verbose than I really would like her to be. She reminds me a bit of my sister in that she is constantly chattering about this or that. And, also in a way that reminds me of my sister, she took it upon herself to become my ethical guide.It is like I have my own Jiminy Cricket. Only unlike Pinocchio, I am not always jazzed about it. She means well, but no one person could possibly be that perfect.She has the sweetest little accent. She is British, and she knows it. That being said, she could probably use that accent to get me to do just about anything if she really put her will behind it.Thank God she's the angel. Otherwise, being her 'moral project' would be hell on earth. Oh yeah
it sometimes feels like just that
I really have no idea how a little girl with blonde curl
The Sun Earned Its P.H.D.Each person has their own reason for smiling. And with each smile comes the lighting up of their eyes. It is one of the most beautiful things, seeing someone's eyes light up with joy. Especially when you know that you helped them brighten up. He gave her a challenge. She accepted. And it just made her so much more beautiful."She's radiant right now, Igor. Absolutely bubbling over with light.""I am aware of this, Faith.""But look at her, Igor. I know that you aren't a romantic or anything less than apathetic, but just look at her.""I'm looking, Faith.""Does it not just warm your heart to see her so happy?""I have no heart, Faith. Neither do you. You are a cluster of neurons in this twisted unreality of her mind.""Oh, would you just forget that for a moment and look at our charge? I know that you prefer to see her grinning maniacally over some half-baked scheme or plot, but can you really deny how lovely she really looks when she is happy?""Alright, Faith. She is pretty. Now leav
Sunny Faces"Glow, sunshine, glow! Yes! This is the girl I know!""I'm going to continue smiling, but that does not mean you can continue sounding like Tour Guide Barbie, Faith.""But I haven't seen you this happy in quite while! Look at you, look how much more beautiful you are when you smile! What has you in such high spirits?""I, for one, can tell you that our schvibzik has not been into mischievous acts as she should have been.""No, Igor, I have not been wreaking havoc, but I still am happy. Family does that to you sometimes.""How so?""Well, family will piss you off pretty badly at times. On the other hand, it is days like today that really make you thankful for them. I held a beautiful little girl, the newest addition to our family. And I played soccer with my cousins and just ran.""You look beautiful. If that is what family does to you, then you should be around them more often.""It was a beautiful day, the likes of which I have not seen in quite a while. The chance to be out in such b
Fading Sunshine"Your smile is wistful, sunshine. What has you so nostalgic?""Just some memories from the past.""And they pertain to-?""Childhood summers. The ones that I used to spend with my grandfather. Way back when life was simple and the only thing that I had to worry about was what kind of popsicle I wanted that day.""So what brought on this trip down memory lane?""I saw my grandfather yesterday evening. And I was pulling everything that I could possibly remember about him out of thin air last night. I wanted him to remember so badly...""Remember what?""Himself, my name, my father, all those days we spent together in the lazy heat...anything. I just wanted to see a glimpse of the man that used to be... Seeing someone you love so dearly in a state of utter confusion is heartbreaking beyond belief.""I can see that...""I used to go and visit him for weeks at a time when I was younger. He lived, quite literally, in the middle of nowhere. It was this little podunk town in Mississippi, and I
Fragile As China"You're crying, sunshine.""Go away, Faith. And please don't even start with your vitriolic comments, Igor. I really don't think I can take it today.""Baby doll, your mind is in shambles at the moment. Even if we felt like we should listen to you, there would be nowhere for us to go.""Schvibzik, you are an ugly crier. What's the reason behind the waterworks? Did one of your precious teacups shatter?""Do you two not get that I just want to be left alone? Neither of you are real; you can't feel real feelings. All you have is some cracked out view of how I feel. But you don't know the meanings behind those feelings, or why they make me feel so high and low at times. You two cannot perceive anything beyond your little tea analogies.""We understand a lot more of your feelings than you are inclined to believe, sunshine.""Actually, Faith, I don't think that you do.""Then, my little schvibzik, tell us what is going on in this tawdry, shall we say, and drama filled little head of yours."
Cue the Hallelujah Chorus"I haven't seen you this rapturous with glee since you poured pencil shavings into that kid's spaghetti back in the third grade, schvibzik.""Actually, she was quite zealous with joy a few months ago, when she got to ride in that truck...""You're both wrong, you know. I was quite overjoyed most recently by getting correct answers on a physics test using a random number generator.""True, but that was dishonest and therefore I do not count that.""The pencil shavings were more amusing, I think.""Oh shut up, you two. Neither of those come anywhere close to what has me so happy at the moment. Therefore, I will enlighten you! Igor, break out your falsetto, and Faith, cue the Hallelujah Chorus! Pandora is aliiiiiive!""Oh, that? I hardly find that noteworthy.""I do! It means that I can lose myself once more in the internet, instead of relying on you two for entertainment.""In that case, sunshine, I hope that Pandora dies again.""Faith!"